A Series of Questionable Events

Dream Journal 08-02-16

Something . . . floating,

Something . . . spinning

Something aquamarine heading . . . here?

These were the hazy thoughts that fluttered around my mind as I awoke. Had I missed something big? Was this another evacuation? I looked outside my window and saw a giant aquamarine gemstone plummeting down. Normally I would fear something like this but we have Caped Baldy so we do not need to fear, he would stop the anything that threatened this city.

Only thing is, he didn’t. It seems as if One Punch Man was too busy too help us ’cause he was too busy playing the game “Full Haired Heroes” on his tablet and couldn’t be bothered to to anything like this on his lunchbreak.

There wasn’t much that I could do so I ran around trying to get people to evacuate. This thing was coming at us from the sky and it was really dangerous. The people of this city seemed to not even care that their lives were in danger. Did they not care for their ability to think reasonably? Had no no sense of self preservation? All they did was stare at their phones checking the latest facebook statusses. But like all great heroes, I too had a secret weapon.

I had recently met up with the team at the University of Chicago and the Argonne National Library who had just performed macroscopic quantum entanglement at room temperature. I gathered the people around under the pretense of a Kardashian presence and gave them a lecture on Truth anf Falsity followed up by Quantum cooling and nuclear fisson.

By my third sentence the entire region had cleared the impact zone. It was just Caped Badly and I that were left in the centre of the meteorites anticipated impact zone.

I thought about running away to a safezone or a monster shelter. Deeming it useless I went into a Socratic dialogue and dubbed myself the gadfly.

My final thought. “Damnit James!”


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